Monday, April 16, 2007

Martha says...


Do you know what this is? It is a gigantic pile of CLEAN laundry!My girl Jeanette, came over to help cuz when i said I had 15 loads to fold, she thought I was exaggerating. Of course, Morgan sat and "supervised" beer in hand. Hey buddy! Pony up and get folding. You know what happens to burned out mommas? They get sick.

See these handsome devils? (love how Vaughn has mastered the my mom is a scrapbooker pose and no I didn't pose him this way, he did it himself)I pawned them off on the first taker! I woke up at 3 am and the wrath of God was upon me, except I didn't die, I only felt like I was about to. Jessi brought me some gingerale and a water bottle. The heat felt awesome on my spazaming tummy. Finally I fell asleep..but then, I am like what the????? i think I was so asleep I peed the bed!!! Thank freakin goodness that it was only the water bottle! It tipped over when I fell asleep and leaked. How embarassing would that of been? Oh wait, I just told you all so I guess whatever. My house did not smell of clean and lysol. Karla, please come love me cuz this gal got zero in the empathy dept from DH who could have lent a hand. The D official stands for (damn, dumb...take your pick)Wait til you get sick and I am going to drop the kids at your house after I take them for ice cream and get them all jacked up!!! Tee hee hee

How pretty am I? I know, not so pretty

I need my "smokes". I am addicted to bonne bell lipsmacker cappuccino! I have Jeanette buying one for every purse, gymbag etc too...try I am not kidding.

and of course you need the cel phone, for texting people, the house phone- and the hot water bottle- leak or not- it felt soooo good!

and last but certainly not least...you have a good pal who brings ya the Timmy's chicken soup. I actually ate it and didn't try to figure out later with the porcelain gods if it was chicken...
also, since I have felt wretched for over a week, I am burning up the blog today girls.I was a lot pissy at my sister. SHe hands me a box of party lite stuff, a list of names and says, hey you are throwing me a birthday party in a week on sunday and i already told everyone.
key what??? Sunday is a school night and my kids go to bed at seven, I have been sick for a week, I don't have any of these girls phone numbers...and on and on. Luckily Martha is always prepared, but I wanted to dish out a little smack in the back of the head momma style...like hey lady, i am not your servant and please would be nice.Apparently it was a sit down dinner for 15 and cocktails were at 6:30 dinner at 7 blah blah. Sooo I had to feed my family then her entourage. (thanks Stacy for not feeling well cuz I was swamped!)I do hope you don't have what I did. So anyhoo- I pulled this little diddy out of my arse and managed not to kill my sister and her loud friend Kelly. They were only 10 feet from Ireland's room and they got louder and louder. At 9:30 I said, get out, thanks for coming.

so I made a chocolate cheesecake look pretty with some repurposed flowers that finally bloomed AFTER Easter came and went and I used them throughout my decorating

Set up the table and jeanette was like- get the royal chinet and put away the china momma!Supposedly I was to have helpers to clean up, but no, it was just me, grrr

And Auntie with my kiddos who were all up way past their bedtime. Didn't get a thanks either, but you know that whole goes around comes around thing? The lady at wal-mart let me make my 8x10 pic before she printed off her 300 pics from a trip. So I guess karma can be good to ya sometimes.
Did I sleep after all that?? Oh no, I babysat! But after this kid snapped a pick of my butt crack, it was the easiest babysitting job ever. Not sure how the story will play out there but I love when I get to babysit her, better than retail therapy cuz she cracks me up!

10 comments:

jessi said...

ROTFLMAO!!!!!! k..so i know it's not funny and I was there throughout parts of the weekend and we had a ton of phone conversations...so i totally know what a raw deal you got...but chica...hearing you describe it to the rest of the world has me peeing my pants!!!! And I have no water bottle to blame...it's at your house...LMAO!!!

have a fabulous day!!!

Karla said...

DUDE!!!!!!! I am feeling you all on all the laundry. Ok...you don't believe me? Watch my next post. I am going to let the truth out!!! LOL!!!!! And PLEASE tell me you have your own buisness with a cake and table like that? I mean MAN>>>>>>>>>> I have THREE weddings to come. I will be-a-callin'!

I'm on that journal! And as I told Daisy...Tomarrows The Day!!!!!

-Karla

Renee said...

Well so glad you're sounding better...lmao....my god what a raw deal you got and being sick and stuff.....well to give you the low down the dh has laid off a bit on my end...thank god...we'll talk soon.....

sohpiasmom said...

Man that's a lot of laundry!! Just found your blog and am loving it! That cappucion lip gloss looks goooooooood...I think I'll have to get me some :)

Stacy said...

k i totally get it with the laundry and your sis she has been a bad girl as of late and just so that you i had comapany not sick my sis also came down from calgary so i could not leave aw and need i mention how could have been any help well if you gave me a chair i could have loaded the washer for yeah but the cooking not sure how i could have helped there either lol!!! anyways we talked i am not in trouble lol!!

Lynn said...

Does that sight look familiar, i really think people don't believe you!!!!!! This is absolutely hilarious but now that people know that you are Martha that is the way it goes..... Everyone wants a piece of the action sick or not! Hope you are feeling a bit better!

Lynn

Kimberly White said...

Amazing what you can pull together girl! I'm impressed! Hope you are finally feeling better! Kim

Linda said...

Caught you on Jessi's blog....too funny. Sorry you weren't feeling well and you are amazing...can't believe you pulled that dinner thing off for your oh so not thoughtful sister. Lovin that creative thing you got going.

Beautiful day - Linda

Kimberly White said...

Cool banner Tannis! Kim

Ronda P. said...

where do I start....hate laundry, my least favorite job....would rather clean the toilets. Dude if I lived closer, I would take the kids, feed & take care of you, & Lysol the house. That table looks awesome & the cake is beautiful!